so unlike moocow we dont have time to write everyday. we got other shit to do.
yes besides chirping. we do other stuff you know.
so let's look at a normal day in the lives of the crickets
midnight - chirping
2 am - more chirping
2:05 - play moomouth, which is the most awesome game ever. basically we take turns trying to put the largest object in moocow's mouth without him waking up. harriet's the current champion after she somehow managed to fit a pair of socks, 3 peeps, and a copy of Jane magazine in his maw without him waking up.
3 am - chirping karoke contest. mikey usually wins with an awesome version of "dont stop believing." journey fucking rules.
4 am - try to fall asleep, yell at shannon to shut stop chirping. hey, we think its just as annoying as you do.
5 am - give up on tossing and turning, and head out to the living room to watch some infomercials. flip around looking for girls gone wild, but then give up and settle for the magic bullet mixer.
5:05 - sneak into moo's room and pull out his credit card. order six mixers.
5:06 - and overnight shipping.
6 am - chirping
7 am - place bets on how many times moo hits the snooze button in the morning. one.
7:09 - two
7:18 - three
7:27 - four. alex loses.
7:36 - five. sheesh, let's skip ahead here a bit
8:12 - on number eight, moo gets out of bed. maria takes the money.
8:15 - make moo toast and coffee.
8:27 - moo isnt out of the shower yet. eat the toast and drink the coffee ourselves.
8:30 - pretend to be asleep as dripping moo rushes around the house smelling laundry in an attempt to find something clean.
9 am - chirping.
3 pm - whew. that was some good chirping. relax with a glass of soy milk and white castle.
4 pm - bow chicka bow waaah.
4:37 - and again. crickets have needs you know.
5 pm - time for our foreign language lessons.
5:02 - le chirp
5:09 - donde estaba las chirpas
5:22 - fooking chirp!
5:38 - konichi-chirp
6 pm - throw pennies at the squirrels outside.
6:30 - moo comes home, takes off his pants and begins muttering about "so what's the deal with chicken fries? are they chicken? are they fries?"
7 pm - more chirping
8 pm - form a conga line.
8:02 - realize we have no idea why. avoid eye contact with each other and spend the next hour in an awkward silence.
9 pm - during one particularly quite moment, billy lets out an enourmous chirp - and farts at the same time. everyone begins laughing. aw billy.
10 pm - chirping.
so see. this is why we cant write everyday. we're way too busy